Peyton's Little Nursery

written: 12.12.22

Peyton would kick and roll like crazy every time I was in her room decorating and getting things all ready. Memories I’ll cherish forever with my sweet baby girl!! I just loved her room a lot...her and I spent a lot of time in there together alone...

Taking everything down was a nightmare...I look back and almost can't remember anything or even how I had the strength too do it on my own...it's all a blur...a huge blur. Lost dreams of putting her too bed at night in her crib...or changing her diaper...I redid that changing table dresser just for her and I couldn't wait to use it and lay her on it. I used to sit in her room and imagine what it would be like to see her playing with toys in the middle of the room or sitting on the white bench in front of the window looking at books...I loved imaging the future with her, I couldn't wait for her to get here and play with me. My house had the best long hallway out to the main part of the house and I would sit a imagine her crawling down the hallway or running up and down it. I just couldn't wait....The thought of losing my baby never crossed my mind and I believe that is the hardest part about losing her...I never expect it and yet I have to trust that God has a plan...even when nothing makes sense. Just look at her room...I cry and smile every time I look at these pictures....just so beautiful, I loved every minute creating this place and space with her, everyday together was a dream and the day I lost her...I lost apart of me.